(Neveilah is a simple woman with Dreams of Meshugas. She dreams of Meshugas and writes about it on her own blog. Where do her dreams of Meshugas come from? Is she a Navi or a Naviette? Maybe. Is she a direct pipeline to Shamayim? Could well be. Is she off her medication and running her own cult? It’s entirely possible.)
I dreamed of Moshiach last night and he told me that woman are total foxes in his view. I told him no one has used foxy for women since the 80s. He backed up from me and said… Begone Hussy!!!
I was taken up in a whirlwind to a place called Lasharai ha Marabein which loosely translated means “nothing” since it was told to me in *tongues*. Yes dear gentile reader, I found out xians are correct. And speaking in tongues especially through a demonically possessed paranoid schizophrenic, this is very holy, in that nothing place I was beaten with 10 rods of almond decorated with Xmas lights and told to shut my mouth.
Then I woke up and found I was sleeping in the remains of the coffee I had downed the night before. After changing into dry clothing I began my intensive study of the works of the holy maarooha who tells us that women are sinful vessels of sin and sinful sinners of sin too. Their luscious bodies are tantalizing men day and night!! These wanton hussies of hell are the cause of all rotten things on earth and even hell!
Yes my gentile reader, even hell is effected by the sin of evil sheitlach topped women who show the tips of fingers like the sluts they are. Imagine them as they walk down the streets and the backs of their shoes showing where men can see them and have dreams and lusting that goes on for hours and days and months and years…
Longing and filled with all kiinds of lustful passion and lust and more lust and more passion and even uncontrollable drooling. As is known, the only way for women to redeem the world is by adopting the title “little moshiach” or moshiacha ktana and then having dreams that are holy like I do.
I dream these dreams of men in lustful rampages night after night after long lonely night alone in my apartment. I see these poor besotted men longing for women. I feel their longing!!! It is my lot in life and my holy mission to tell you all about it ad nauseum.
Over the last few months it has been my privilege to get to know a young woman named Shprintzele Ruckheizer who is not only autistic but also classified as a genuine moron. Her uncontrolled fits of rage and violence are really messages from on high as she bites and kicks and scratches those around her, I and others who approach the madrega of tzarat gadol can read the lines of blood and gore as they run down the arms of the victims of her rage, in these we find pure prophecy, the purest. It is almost as good as reading the entrails of goats, though not quite.
Today while looking at the deep gouges that Shprintzele had made on her dear Rabbi’s foot, I saw a message of warning about the women of America and Israel and their sheitels of DOOM. Yes the word DOOM was there as plain as can be. We are doomed because of badly made sheitlach, and sheitelmachers who just dont give a hoot about their clientele. Oh the infamy of a bad haircut! It was revealed to me as I went into a stupor that these sheitels are all made of 100% pagan hair!!! No matter what the label says, it is all pagan and evil. (Dear gentile reader some of them actually lit up this past Halloween!)
I say to you now in real navi sheker form that women must be controlled through hypnotism or they will condemn the world to obesity. Only when women all shave their headers and wear yellow raincoats everywhere they go will Moshiach finally come (who might be me in drag).
I used to look at myself in a sheitel before I knew the truth and do you know what was revealed to me by the holy ones??? It was that I was ugly and that my sheitel looked like a bed bug infested nest on top of my head!!! Now, that is not pulling any punches and is the truth!!! You dont hear this kind of truth on other blogs, you just do not!!! And why is that? Because I am the real deal, pal. I am a real prophetess and a genUine Tzadakes.
It isn’t easy for me to admit this in public, especially a public laden with lust filled males who look at me longingly as I parade around in my burka. Yes, they are even filled with passion and lust by the mere thought of me in my burka, they long to know what is underneath and how fat I really am!!! But, dear reader, only I know that.
I have never been seen without my burka since the day I realized my sheitel was receiving messages from the mother ship. Oh yes, I tried lining it with tin foil like other frum women. I tried waxed paper too but it melted down on my face in summer. I even tried covering it with a Yankees baseball cap. As is known, ball caps have magic power to repel the sitra achra. But it was to no avail. There simply is no way to avoid the evil messages that are beamed down into the very hairs of a woman’s head and even into the FAKE HAIR OF A PAGAN SHEITEL!
This little known fact was revealed to me and now I and the holy Rav Meyer Spinachski, who passed away 300 years ago in Southern France but who came to me in a dream, confirm to you it is the truth. Only by burning your expensive hand tie dyed sheitlach on a funeral pyre made of old cinnamon buns and copies of the Sunday New York Times, can you destroy the evil therein.
(WARNING: do NOT try this at home. I am a professional blog writer so its ok for me) it’s life giving truth!
Instead bring your filthy sin filled sheitlach to my house, I will sell them on eBay and send the proceeds to Rav Spinachski so that he might retire in peace in Tel Aviv where there are no immodest women to distract him. He is worn out with chasing women around all his life in his effort to reform them according to his own views, especially on the beaches in his speedo bathing suit secure in the knowledge no evil women can see him and lust after him! Or worse yet… cause him to lust after them!
Modesty is the watchword that was heard before Assyria attacked Israel. Modesty was the word heard in a kol isha from mars just as Nevuchanetzer attacked. Modesty was the byword for so much of our history. And in 70 CE It was that great hero Herod the Great… whom Jews loved and whom Hashem put in power, who said.. Modesty is my middle name!
I urge you all to live a modest life out of the public eye, just like me. Put all thought from your mind. Why think when you have so many rabbis whose views I made up and Me to do it for you? Our souls and minds are clean unlike yours. So you can relax and coast on into eternity on our merit!!! Just let us fill your minds from now on.
Some ladies have asked me how I now cover my hair since sheitels are so evil. Well when I was seeking a way to stop the transmissions from the mother ship, I found that Charmin toilet paper was the best. Soft, comfortable and non chaffing, it is form fitting and looks quite nice wrapped around the head many times in a lovely turban just like our Yishmaeli sisters. It creates a soft fluffy turban like appearance that is useful in other ways too.
I recommend it highly as some fabrics used for tichels and snoods are pagan. In fact… most of them are not made by holy Jews but by people of very dubious background who have never read my blog so they are by their very origin… pagan!!! Only Charmin fits the bill for proper hair covering. Please remember though that you must avoid the rain as it is both wet and very pagan.
One other thing before I must go for the evening. When walking outside women must take into consideration the rain which has been sucked up from the ground by clouds. and falls from who knows what pagan filled nation this can render all your clothing dirty and rotten and can soil and despoil men around you. Therefore women are counseled to remain inside unless the weather is nice.
Only in the merit of staying out of the rain will the holy women of our generation (me) bring Moshiach (also me).
Remember : Women are holier than holy. And women are filthy and sinful. If you are a man avoid these holy sinful filthy wanton tramps as much as you can. They will bring Moshiach.
Autistics tell us Moshiach’s first name is Howard. Full name Howard M. Moshiach. No wait, I’m getting another message from the mothership. His name is Joyce. His first name is Joyce. Joyce Moshiach.